In the aftermath comes receptivity.
In the aftermath of rage and destruction comes receptivity, subtlety, gratitude, joy: those are your rewards for bravery and good deeds in philosophy and spirituality. We don't necessarily get any certainty or lasting sense of superiority - it fades. What we get is a sense of being more alive. Which is itself dangerous: to live with a cracked open space, to live with less certainty, with the sense that many valences are dancing their dance, and which of them will turn out to be dominant is not known. This is true always: everything will be reinterpreted at a later time - by history, by inertia, by the process of living. Therefore what anything is at any one time is always up for grabs: that's what it means to live einverleibt with a Nietzschean education. It means to acquiesce to the continually superseding judgments of history: that you don't know what you are now, nor what you will be, nor what will be made of you by those who come after. The only certainty is that you are wormfood: so be dirt, so make friends with dirt - make friends with the worms preemptively. Make friends with the idea that you are already on fire: that your bones are being dried for someone else's kiln. That you are already food: not only will you be consumed and transformed, but that your degree of freedom now is to become food - this is what it means to make medicine. To be a person of medicine: a well that does not run dry, because one is willing to crack open space a little more, to find a deeper aquifer. To dig for the bigger yes, the finer ore of affirmation. That vein of anguish and joy reaching back to your ancestors: the very worms gathering around you, chanting your ancient names - "wormfood", "earth", "the river of light".
